How To Be Your Child's Best Friend Part 1

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Parenting is tough, we all agree. Despite the challenges, it is the desire of every parent to have a strong bond with their children.

Paternal love may be natural but it does not come automatically but rather through hard work.

Loving your children is not the only thing to do for your children, you also need to be their friend. The greatest challenge in parenthood is being your child’s best friend.

In this case, I would like to share a bit of my personal experience having been brought up by parents who are church ministers. In the few years that I have been under their custody, I have picked up a few things which I would like to share and be of help to parents trying to reach out to their teenagers.

Here are some of the tips to be your child’s best friend.

1.    Learn to separate your job title and your parental title

The greatest challenge comes when separating your job and responsibility as a parent. This will scare away your children.

A good example is when my mother wears the hat of a counselor at home. Sometimes it comes in handy when we need guidance but sometimes it goes overboard when all I need is a listening ear.

Just strike a balance if you need to dish out the professional card at home.

2.    Understand they are growing up

One of the greatest mistakes parents make is making their children remain kids forever. At times it is important to let your kids especially teenagers take charge of their lives.

This makes them feel that they can be trusted and so they’ll do all they can to keep that trust. Sometimes they will even come to you for some leadership advice which will create a bond.

3.    Let them learn from their own mistakes at times

One funny thing I have observed with my both parents is, the fear of us going astray or making wrong turns. Having many eyes on us as pastor’s kids, our parents live with the fear of us disappointing them at some point.

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This is funny because they can only watch us when we are around them.

Mum always tells us we can only be under their nose when we are at home but after that, it is up to us.

I believe that has made us understand that our time at home is limited and somehow draws us closer to her.

4.    Let them know they can trust you with their secrets

The one thing parents really desire is to know that their children can be confined in them whenever they have something they are not free to share with just anyone.

Children, however, are always afraid of their secrets being used against them whenever they go wrong.

If you want your child to be confined in you, be careful to separate a child who needs a friend and a child who needs to be disciplined. The instruments used for discipline should come no close to the ones used for support.

This article was compiled by Victory Tali and she will be sharing more in the next post so keep checking the blog.

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