Sex Conversation Parents Should Be Ready For

Courtesy:birthbreathanddeath.com

Parenting comes with tasks and responsibilities. Parents telling each other anecdotes and seeking advice on the different stages and experiences they have had while their kids were teething, crawling, learning to walk and morning struggles on their first school day are very normal. 

 

In the African culture, parents seeking advice or sharing stories of how to talk or introduce sex conversation in the home is rare.  

Sex is not a very hot topic for family bonding time. Most children teach themselves, learn from their peers, or read about sex in magazines or on the internet. 

Parents go the extra mile in getting extra coaching for a child whose performance in school isn’t up to the standards. Some even call counselors to come to talk to their children, but when it comes to sex education, we let nature take its cause. To parents, Biology only has a topic of Sexual reproductive health let us not confuse it for sex education.

Also Read Children's Rights And Safety In Digital Age. 

 

Today’s society exposes children to sexual images, languages, and behaviors at a very young and early age. The assumption that they are too young to understand anything will be a shock to you when your child asks a simple question that will make you turn red and not respond to it since you aren’t prepared to have that conversation with them. 

To parents who ignore the Sex conversations it is vital we:

Understand the importance of sex education

Promoting abstinence is completely ineffective, good sex education is very helpful. What parents do is tell their children how horrible and evil sex is. Don't Do It! Children get to puberty then emotions and curiosity get control of them and they want to explore the evil side of sex only to discover that it isn’t as evil as they had been told. This prevents them from coming back to you and proving you wrong so it becomes a dark kept secret that comes out when the consequences are out. Truth is the best sex education is a sober conversation between parent and child. 

Talk about sex  

Children who do not or cannot talk about sex with their parents rarely or never talk about it with their sexual partners. Yes, they engage in sexual activities but they’re ashamed of talking about what they are doing. Sex talks are important because they demystify some sex myths that we hear of, bringing in more knowledge and understanding. This will help your child develop a positive and healthy attitude toward sex. 

 

Courtesy: Teen talk.ca

Need to Do Sexual Orientations with our Children.

Teach your kids about their bodies, sex, and healthy relationships. Most parents squirm at the thought of talking about these issues because they don’t have much practice and experience with them. With small kids use the correct names for body parts and not nicknames. Parents ought not to be afraid to talk to their kids early and often about sex, love, and healthy relationships. They should be as specific as they are comfortable being about the subject

Read Safe Spaces Available At Decent Conversations.

Be ready for these Innocent Questions  

“Mum and Dad, where do babies come from?” One of the most common innocent questions asked in every home. Almost all parents who answer this question lie by giving very funny false stories of where babies come from. Instead of saying “Mummy went to the market to buy a baby. “ Just explain to them in a simple language that a baby grows up in mummy’s tummy and she goes to the hospital to deliver. Enough of the funny theories children don’t buy them anymore.

Make time to listen to our children.

Parenting in this century comes with lots of challenges. Time is one of the challenges. Parents are too busy working for money to provide for the family. These busy schedules are robbing them of important family time. Even meals are no longer a family affair. As a parent, you need to have time to talk and share with your child. 

One quality every parent must have is listening.  When your child asks or tells you what they know about sex, please! Please! listen to them. Be open-minded and don’t jump to conclusions and start making demands to know where they learned whatever they are asking you or who they are practicing it with.  This can shut them up and they may never share with you such issues ever again.

Tell the truth.

Always be honest when explaining sexual matters to your child. I know it can be difficult but the truth is the best option parents have. Use eye contact and act on their suspicions and beliefs. Advise and explain to them your reasons for telling them to abstain and wait till the right time.  

Tell them when the right time is and who the right person to have sex with is. Let your child ask you all sex-related questions, rather than listen to wild, ridiculous ideas from friends, or adults with bad intentions or read them on the internet. Sex isn’t just a game that people play. It involves all our emotions and feelings and if taken for granted then there will be lots of hurting and pain. 

Trust your child to make the right decisions

Don’t micromanage your children. After talking, sharing, and discussing don’t turn into a spy, monitoring every move your child makes. Give them room and space to grow up and trust that they will follow your advice. Most parents do detective work without having a sex conversation with their child. Trust that the values you have instilled in the will be their guardian angels all through.

A lot can be said about sex education but it is important all of us understood what sex is all about and one thing I’m sure of is that SEX IS SACRED. 

What is your take on sex talk? We would love to hear from you.  Don't forget to subscribe!