Wednesday 2 March 2016

What Next If you are the Other Woman

I have known William for 3 years now and deep down in my heart I felt he is the one. He has been so supportive, caring, and tender. 

We seemed to click at almost everything from career goals to personal lifestyle. I could not wish for anything else.

 "A man who does not pressure you in any aspect  or make any demands, who doesn't want that?"

He always seem to fit perfectly into my life and that is why I could never suspect anything. I was in my own world having found my Prince Charming. Little did I know it was just a fantasy.

Willy had just dropped me off after our Friday night date. My phone rang and the number was unfamiliar, something that was not unusual. I am in the medical profession so every call could be a chance to save a life so I picked quickly.

"Hello, Doctor Stephanie speaking. How may I be of assistance to you?"
"How about staying away from my fiancé', Could you do that for me, doctor?"

The voice on the other end had caught me off guard and whatever she said pierced through my heart in a way that no medical term call fully explain. I added things up quickly and it hit me, I WAS THE OTHER WOMAN. Nothing I would have said would have fixed the mess and no explanation would have helped.

This is how to go about the discovery that, You are the other woman:
  1. Never Justify yourself
Whether you knew or not, justification makes things worse. Clear your name in the best way possible.

 "Sorry for the misunderstanding. I am not sure I know what you are talking about," I said quickly in an attempt to clear the air. 

The voice from the other end was so calm and sure of herself.

"Stay away from Willy, he is taken. And next time does your homework!! I have known you exist for almost a year and this should be the end of it. You deserve better Doc." 

That was harsh but I took the blow standing.

"Thank you for the information. It was never that serious." 

And I ended the call. I could not keep up with the conversation.

2.  Do not Verify. Go with your Gut

I pretended that nothing had happened and communicated with Willy that night as usual but his phone was off. I did not rush to a conclusion and waited for his call the next day. He called me just to cancel our weekend plans due to a 'family emergency'.

This gave me space to reflect back and do my so-called homework. It dawned on me, I have never been to his place nor did I ever meet any of his close friends. My gut was telling me something was wrong. 

We never posted anything online that reflected our relationship. Funny enough, we had agreed not to chat on social media and just use our phones. Whenever we were on dates his phone was always on silent mode and we never did anything impulsive it had to be properly planned. These appeared to be traits of a gentleman to me.

Did I really need any clarification?

3. Cut Off Communication and Change Routine

I felt like I had wasted my time but I did not care for the drama. I ignored his calls and messages and never showed up for our dates. I changed my shift time making it difficult for him to reach out to me.
Willy tried visiting my office severally but he was never allowed in as per my request. After three months of trying. He sent me a bouquet of flowers accompanied by an apology for not telling me the truth.

4. Stay Firm

The romantic gesture almost made me reach out to him but I stood my ground. I had mourned my loss and I was not going to dwell in my blind moments. I wiped my tears and shifted the love I had for my patients.
It is never that serious, you can always start over. The drama and cat fight are never worth it, dignity comes first.

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7 comments:

  1. Woow!!!So well said
    I once was there....its such a trying and difficult time but very strengthening if only you stand your ground

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sometime you may be totally in the dark and it is really painful. However there are those ladies who know the truth and do not care.

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  2. Replies
    1. Take time to know the person you want to get close to.

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    2. Sometimes I think you should just tell him to his face that you know he is wasting your time.

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  3. Easier said than done

    ReplyDelete